Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I don’t buy bullshit

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

4.5 billion years ago, Jupiter was 2.5 times its current size, scientists discover. - Stewartville Star

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

What is your favorite underrated movie and why? What makes it underrated? How did you find it?

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

What would happen if the Earth stopped spinning for one minute?

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

Kanye West Shows Up At Sean 'Diddy' Combs’ Trial—And Quickly Leaves - Forbes

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I have complete contempt for fakery

I see through liars

Wild card Boisson stuns Pegula - Roland Garros

I can read

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

Oura Ring Can Now Use AI to Monitor Blood Sugar Levels. I Tested It For a Week and Got These 3 Surprising Takeaways - CNET

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

Did you know God exists? 900+ answers later and no atheist has yet to be successful. Day 8 of asking Atheists to provide a SINGLE argument that demonstrates a cause for the beginning of the universe while avoiding the problem of infinite regression.

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

Neuroscientists discover biological mechanism that helps the brain ignore irrelevant information - PsyPost

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I have a reading level above third grade

What are some very specific groups of people you just cannot stand?

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

Fast-Track to Happiness: One Week of Micro-Acts Makes a Difference - Neuroscience News

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I actually pay taxes

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I don’t cotton to rapists

I understand how hurricane paths work

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I can count

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability